Written by Jess Schiano for 92PROFM.COM
I have to be honest, I’m not a fan of snow. I want it to snow 1 day a year, Christmas morning, & that’s it! Ok, ok, Christmas Eve, into Christmas morning…that’s it!
Since I’m not a kid anymore…I know my behavior doesn’t reflect that, but still…I don’t get any school or work cancellations, so snow is pointless. But on the off chance I don’t have to go to work and it does snow, here’s a pretty fun schedule that I like to go by:
8:04a
Wake up…note that it’s snowing and you can’t do anything…go back to sleep.
11:08a
It’s about time you have your coffee and a mid morning snack, I recommend Frosted Flakes.
11:32a
Text all your friends and family to see what they’re doing and how much snow they have.
11:39a
Check Twitter to see what they’re doing if they didn’t respond promptly to your texts.
11:51a
Think about shoveling, but then figure, heck it’s still snowing let’s wait, there’s really no point. It’s the thought that counts.
12:09p
Watch a movie, OR start a new series on Netflix, I’m still waiting for a snowstorm to start watching Breaking Bad and Sons of Anarchy.
2:50p
Now it’s time to get a move on…Shovel your walkway, especially if you own a home, because you need the pizza delivery guy to get to you door safely when you order your midday snack.
3:08p
Order pizza.
3:09p
Check the fridge to see if you have any adult beverages.
3:10p
Think about cleaning the house…then laugh…it’s a SNOW DAY, that task would be foolish. A snow day is a gift, like a free day! Don’t waste it with vacuuming or washing stuff.
3:13p
Start drinking an adult beverage in celebration of realizing that you just got a free day!
3:30p
Flip through all 900 of your channels and if you still can’t find anything to watch. It looks like it’s DVR clean up time. Watch all that stuff you have saved and haven’t had time to get to.
3:35p
Pizza arrives! YAY! Grab another bevy to go with your pizza.
4:00p
Ellen is on. Watch her. (Only if it’s a weekday of course). Have a drink while watching Ellen.
4:56p
After having 2 more drinks…take a little nap.
6:04p
That nap was lovely wasn’t it? But you’re hungry again…hmmmm you’re done with pizza…looks like a call to a Chinese delivery place would be perfect!
6:05p
Order Chinese food.
6:08p
Back to seeing what everyone else is doing via text and Twitter…well I can tell you this, they’re not having as awesome time as you.
6:10p
Now you’re getting pretty bored, looks like it’s time for wine.
6:12p
Call your mother and see if she’s okay. She most likely is and then she’s going to say something sarcastic like “Wow, thanks for calling to check on me now, where have you been all day?” Then you say you have to use the bathroom and you’ll call her back.
6:20p
Refill that glass of wine.
6:25p
Find & look through your high school yearbook, then go on Facebook and see how well your friends aged.
7:12p
Chinese food arrived!!!! Good thing that walkway was shoveled. That’s why post 2:50p is so imperative. To make things interesting, try using chopsticks.
7:32p
That was delicious. Back to more wine.
7:55p
Hmmmm, hungry again. Should have never put the Chinese food in the fridge, head back in there.
8:00p
Eat, drink, repeat. Throw on HGTV and watch how pretty much every show is exactly the same.
10:21p
WOW! Where did the time go? Due to the drinking you might have forgotten what you did from 8:01p-10:20p. There also very well could be food stains on your shirt, you could have texted exes, even posted a selfie on Instagram. But hey! It was a snow day! Now brush your teeth and get to bed!
